If you build an fool-proof system, only fools will be able to use it. Stony Smith
  Never hand a two year old a running chainsaw: never show an "user" how to record Excel macros. Some technology just shouldn't be shared. Stony Smith
  640K is enough memory for everyone Bill Gates, 1986
  A bird in hand is worth 10lbs of feed Bhashkar A. Deonandan
  A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines Frank Lloyd Wright
  A dream that is not understood is like a letter that is unopened Carl Jung
  A friend loves you for your intelligence, a mistress for your charm, but your family's love is unreasoning; you were born into it and are of its flesh and blood. Nevertheless it can irritate you more than any group of people in the world André Maurois
  A rattlesnake that doesn't bite teaches you nothing Jessamyn West, The Life I Really Lived
  A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out Walter Winchell
  A study in the Washington Post says that women have better verbal skills than men. I just want to say to the authors of that study: 'Duh' Conan O'Brien
  A woman broke up with me and sent me pictures of her and her new boyfriend in bed together. Solution? I sent them to her dad Christopher Case
  A woman said to Winston Churchill If you were my husband I would give you poison. Churchill replied, if you were my wife I would take it Author Unknown
  Ability is of little account without opportunity Napoleon Bonaparte
  After a while you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and chaining a soul, And you begin to learn that kisses aren't contracts and presents aren't promises, And you learn to build all your roads on today because tomorrow's ground is too uncertain for plans. And you learn that even sunshine burns if you get too much. So plant your own garden and decorate your own soul instead of waiting for someone to bring you the flowers Anon
  Alea Jacta Est  (from Latin, and means The Die is Cast. You say it after you have done something and can't get out of it) Julius Caesar
  Almost all our faults are more pardonable than the methods we think up to hide them La Rochefoucauld
  Applying computer technology is simply finding the right wrench to pound in the correct screw Anonymous
  As for me, I labour always to prepare a way for those willing to follow Samuel de Champlin
  Cats are rather delicate creatures and they are subject to a good many ailments, but I never heard of one who suffered from insomnia Joseph Wood Krutch
  Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow Jeff Valdez
  Cats aren't clean, they're just covered with cat spit John S. Nichols
  Cats seem to go on the principle that it never does any harm to ask for what you want Joseph Wood Krutch
  Chronic remorse is a most undesirable sentiment ... Rolling in the mud is not the best way of getting clean Aldous Huxley
  Cleverness is not wisdom Euripides
  Cocaine is God's way of telling you you've got too much money Sting
  Common sense is genius dressed in its working clothes Ralph Waldo Emerson
  Common sense is not common Will Rogers
  Creative minds always have been known to survive any kind of bad training Anna Freud
  Dance like no one's watching, love like you'll never be hurt, sing like no one's listening, live like it's heaven on earth William Pukey
  Denial ain't just a river in Egypt Mark Twain (1835-1910)
  Diplomacy is the art of postponing inevitable decisions for as long as possible Beuben Slonim
  Do not meddle in the affairs of cats, for they are subtle and will piss on your computer Bruce Graham
  Dogs believe they are human. Cats believe they are God Ernest Hemingway
  Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you later Mary Bly
  Don't be afraid to take a big step if one is indicated. You can't cross a chasm in two small jumps David Lloyd George
  Don't be dismayed at good-byes. A farewell is necessary before you can meet again. And meeting again, after moments or lifetimes, is certain for those who are friends Richard Bach
  Don't let it end like this. Tell them I said something last words of Pancho Villa (1877–1923)
  Don't look back. Something might be gaining on you Leroy ‘Satchel' Paige
  Don't say you don't have enough time. You have exactly the same number of hours per day that were give to Pasteur, Michelangelo, Mother Teresa, Helen Keller, Leonardo da Vinci, Thomas Jefferson, and Albert Einstein H. Jackson Brown Jr.
  Don't talk about yourself, it will be done when you leave Addison Mizner
  Dream as if you'll live forever. Live as if you'll die tomorrow James Dean
  Drive-in banks were established so most of the cars today could see their real owners E. Joseph Cossman
  Duct tape is like the Force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the universe together Carl Zwanzig
  Each day I am with you is better than the last, and my first day with you was the best day of my life Author Unknown
  Eighty percent of success is showing up Woody Allen
  Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work Robert Orben
  Every ending is part of a beginning Jan Lloyd
  Every friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born Anais Nin
  Every man is a damn fool for at least five minutes every day; wisdom consists in not exceeding the limit Elbert Hubbard
  Every man is afraid of something. That's how you know he loves you, when he's afraid of losing you Author Unknown
  Everything that can be invented has been invented Charles H. Duell, Commissioner, US Office of Patents, 1899
  Executive ability is deciding quickly and getting somebody else to do the work John G. Pollard
  Failure is an event, never a person William D. Brown
  Fear of losing is what makes competitors so great. Show me a gracious loser and I'll show you a permanent loser O.J. Simpson
  Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names JFK
  Friends are angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly anonymous
  Friends--lovers that might have been Robert Browning
  From the moon, knowledge Apollo 13 team
  Give me one friend, just one, who meets the needs of all my varying moods Esther M. Clark
  Go to bed. Whatever you're staying up late for isn't worth it Andrew A. Rooney
  Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city George Burns
  Hell is a half-filled auditorium Robert Frost
  How prophetic L'Enfnet was when he laid out Washington as a city that goes around in circles John Mason Brown
  How would you like a job where, every time you make a mistake, a big red light would come on and 18,000 people boo? Jacques Plante
  I am extraordinarily patient provided I get my own way in the end Margaret Thatcher
  I am not young enough to know everything Oscar Wilde
  I ask people why they have deer heads on their walls. They always say because it's such a beautiful animal. There you go. I think my mother is attractive, but I have photographs of her Ellen DeGeneres
  I can't really remember the names of the clubs that we went to Shaquille O'Neal on whether he had visited the Parthenon during his visit to Greece
  I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use Galileo Galilei
  I do not look to the future ... it comes soon enough Einstein
  I don't know anything about music. In my line you don't have to Elvis Presley
  I don't need a friend who changes when I change and who nods when I nod; my shadow does that much better Plutarch
  I don't want the cheese, I just want to get out of the trap Latin American Proverb
  I don't want to get to the end of my life and find that I just lived the length of it. I want to have lived the width of it as well Diane Ackerman
  I forget what I was taught. I only remember what I have learned P.White, The Solid Mandala
  I have never let my schooling interfere with my education Mark Twain
  I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior Hippolyte Taine
  I heard someone tried the monkeys-on-typewriters bit trying for the plays of William Shakespeare, but all they got was the collected works of Francis Bacon Bill Hirst
  I just broke up with someone and the last thing she said to me was, 'You'll never find anyone like me again!' I'm thinking, 'I should hope not! If I don't want you, why would I want someone like you?' Larry Miller
  I know the Virginia players are smart because you need a 1500 SAT to get in. I have to drop bread crumbs to get our players to and from class George Raveling, Washington State basketball coach
  I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known Walt Disney
  I play football. I'm not trying to be a professor. The tests don't seem to make sense to me, measuring your brain on stuff I haven't been through in school Clemson recruit Ray Forsythe, who was ineligible as a freshman because of academic requirements
  I think there is a world market for maybe five computers Thoms Watson, Chairman of IBM, 1943
  I was recently on a tour of Latin America, and the only regret I have was that I didn't study Latin and remove all doubt Mark Twain
  It is difficult what to say is impossible, for the dream of yesterday is the hope of today and the reality of tomorrow Goddard
  It is easier to resist at the beginning than at the end Leonardo da Vinci
  It is far more impressive when others discover your good qualities without your help Judith Martin
  It isn't as if there was anything very wonderful about my little corner. Of course for people who like cold, wet, ugly bits it is something rather special Eeyore
  It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's the impurities in our air and water that are doing it Vice President Dan Quayle
  It still holds true that man is most uniguely human when he turns obstacles into opportunities Eric Hoffer
  It's a complex world. I hope you'll learn to make distinctions. A peach is not its fuzz, a toad is not its warts, a person is not his or her crankiness. If we can make distinctions, we can be tolerant, and we can get to the heart of our problems instead of wrestling endlessly with the gross exteriors.... Your assumptions are your windows on the world. Scrub them off every once in a while, or the light won't come in Alan Alda, at his daughter's commencement address
  It's a great pity the right to free speech isn't based on the obligation to say something sensible Author Unknown
  It's bad enough being miserable, but it is even worse when everyone else claims to be miserable, too Eeyore
  It's easy to identify people who can't count to ten. They're in front of you in the supermarket express lane June Henderson
  It's kinda fun to do the impossible… Walt Disney
  It's like I've always said: You can get more with a kind word and a 2 x 4 than you can with just a kind word Marcus Cole: Ceremonies of Light and Darkness (Babylon 5)
  It's not how old you are, but how you are old Marie Dressler
  It's not what the world has to offer, but what you bring to the world Anne of Green Gables
  It's the hardest thing in the world to accept a pinch of success and leave it that way Marlon Brando
  Keep thy hook always baited, for a fish lurks even in the most unlikely waters Ovid
  Know thyself. Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive Mayes
  Laugh and the world laughs with you, cry and you cry alone Eli Wilcox Wheeler
  Life is either a daring adventure or nothing Helen Keller
  Life is what happens while you are making other plans John Lennon
  Life loves to be taken by the lapel and told: I am with you kid. Let's go Maya Angelou
  Little drops of water wear down big stones Russian proverb
  Live each day as if your life had just begun Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe
  Love comes from blindness, friendship from knowledge Comte de Bussy-Rabutin
  Man who stumble over the same rock twice deserve to break neck Chinese Proverb
  Managing senior programmers is like herding cats Dave Platt
  May our nation continue to be the beakon of hope to the world The Quayles' 1989 Christmas card [Not a beacon of literacy, though.]
  Music ... can name the un-nameable and communicate the unknowable Leonard Bernstein
  Music expresses that which cannot be put into words and that which cannot remain silent Victor Hugo
  My good friends, this is the second time in our history that there has come back from Germany to Downing Street peace with honour ... I believe it is peace for our time Neville Chamberlain, Address on return from Munich, September 1938
  My mom said she learned how to swim. Someone took her out in the lake and threw her off the boat. That's how she learned how to swim. I said, 'Mom, they weren't trying to teach you how to swim' Paula Poundstone
  My problem lies in reconciling my gross habits with my net income Errol Flynn
  My theology, briefly, is that the universe was dictated but not signed Christopher Morley
  Never bend your head. Always hold it high. Look the world straight in the eye Helen Keller
  No heaven will not ever Heaven be; Unless my cats are there to welcome me Anonymous
  No man is rich enough to buy back his past Oscar Wilde
  No one can earn a million dollars honestly William Jennings Bryan
  No one can make you feel inferior without your consent Eleanor Roosevelt
  Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein Football commentator and former player Joe Theismann
  Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted Albert Einstein
  Nothing in small print is ever good news Andy Rooney
  Now they show you how detergents take out bloodstains, a pretty violent image there. I think if you've got a T-shirt with a bloodstain all over it, maybe laundry isn't your biggest problem Jerry Seinfeld
  Of course everything has been said that needs to be said--but since no one was listening it has to be said again Author Unknown
  Often men can see farther through a tear than through a telescope Leo J. Muir
  On the whole, I'd rather be in Philadelphia W.C. Fields, his own epitaph
  One cat just leads to another Ernest Hemingway
  One must separate from anything that forces one to repeat ‘No' again and again Friedrich Nietzsche
  Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former Albert Einstein
  Past experience should be a guide post, not a hitching post Anonymous
  People that hate cats, will come back as mice in their next life Faith Resnick
  People who say it cannot be done should not interrupt those who are doing it Anonymous
  Pessimism leads to weakness, optimism to power William Jumes
  Pity the meek, for they shall inherit the earth Don Marquis
  Plan ahead ... it wasn't raining when Noah built the ark James B. Conant
  Politics has nothing to do with intelligence Ambassador Londo Mollair of Centauri Prime (Babylon 5)
  Practice makes perfect, but no one is perfect, so why practice? Author Unknown
  Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning Rich Cook
  Pure logic is the ruin of the spirit Antoine De Saint-Exupery
  Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one Albert Einstein
  Republicans understand the importance of bondage between a mother and child Vice President Dan Quayle
  Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you Carl Gustav Jung
  Some people have a way with words, and others ... well ... "not have way", I guess Steve Martin
  Some people say that cats are sneaky, evil, and cruel. True, and they have many other fine qualities as well Missy Dizick
  Sometimes I think war is God's way of teaching us geography Paul Rodriguez
  Statistics are no substitute for judgement Henry Clay
  Straighten up your room first, then the world Jeff Jordan
  Success is more attitude than aptitude Author Unknown
  Taking joy in life is a woman's best cosmetic Rosalind Russell
  Technology is a way of organizins to give passing hospitality to our friends' opinions Joseph Joubert
  The Sun, with all the planets revolving around it, and depending on it, can still ripen a bunch of grapes as though it had nothing else in the Universe to do. Galileo Galilei
  There was life before Coronation Street but it didn't amount to much Russel Harty
  There's a crack in everything. That's how the light gets through Leonard Cohen
  We should take care not to make the intellect our god; it has, of course, powerful muscles, but no personality Albert Einstein
  Welcome to President Bush, Mrs. Bush, and my fellow astronauts Vice President Dan Quayle
  Well ... if you're going to have delusions, might as well go for the really satisfying ones Marcus Cole: The Summoning (Babylon 5)
  Well, I'm sure we can resolve this in a mature way. Right, Mr. Poopypants? Leslie Nielsen
  We're Going To War To Defend People Who Won't Let Women Drive? on a lapel button during the Gulf War
  What a waste it is to lose one's mind. Or not to have a mind is being very wasteful. How true that is Vice President Dan Quayle
  What is a friend? A single soul dwelling in two bodies Aristotle
  What is now proved was once only imagin'd William Blake
  What you think in the egotism of anger you will pay for in the humiliation of saner moments Crane
  Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought of as half as good Ella Wheeler Wilcox
  When a friend is in trouble, don't annoy him by asking if there is anything you can do. Think up something appropriate and do it Edgar W. Howe
  When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've never tried before Mae West
  When I am working on a problem I never think about beauty. I only think about how to solve the problem. But when I have finished, if the solution is not beautiful, I know it is wrong Buckminster Fuller
  When trying to rescue friends from a tree, make sure the plan doesn't involve having everybody stand on your back Eeyore
  When we ask for advice, we are usually looking for an accomplice Marquis de la Grange
  When you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on Franklin D. Roosevelt
  When you look at Prince Charles, don't you think that someone in the Royal family knew someone in the Royal family? Robin Williams
  Whenever a Very Bouncy Animal arrives in the Forest, and you are told that he has just come, the thing you should ask is: 'When is he going?' Eeyore
  Who hears music feels his solitude peopled at once Robert Browning
  Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant? I'm halfway through my fishburger and I realize, Oh my God ... I could be eating a slow learner Lynda Montgomery
  Why don't you write books people can read? Nora Joyce to her husband James
  Why would anyone expect him to come out smarter? He went to prison for three years, not Princeton Boxing promoter Dan Duva on Mike Tyson hooking up again with promoter Don King
  Worry is as useless as sawing sawdust Anonymous
  You are so important to my days--and so essential to the smile within me. That certain space where our lives overlap is the place that brings me the most understanding, the most peace, the nicest memories Collin McCarty
  You can avoid having ulcers by adapting to the situation: if you fall in the mud puddle, check your pockets for fish Anonymous
  You can no more win a war than you can win an earthquake Jeanette Rankin
  You can usually judge the caliber of a man by the size of the things that get his goat Anonymous
  You can't have everything. Where would you put it? Steven Wright
  You guys line up alphabetically by height Bill Peterson, a Florida State football coach
  You guys pair up in groups of three, then line up in a circle Bill Peterson
  You will always be lucky if you know how to make friends with strange cats Colonial American proverb